Saturday, July 26, 2008

TWIR

The Blog went through a lot of trouble to find the right videos to launch Super Positivity and Happiness Parade Week - so watch the damn things will you? Jeez.

1. Senator Robert Menendez (D-NJ) is attempting to block re-authorization of the E-Verify Program, which allows verification of a job applicant's Visa or immigration status. First you have to ask yourself why a sitting US Senator, sworn to uphold the US Constitution would do such a thing. Then you have to thank that Marie Antionette of NJ politics Jon Corzine for appointing this convicted corruption dude to represent me.

2. I am only 50% whiter than Barack Obama and I have Irish blood. I knew this Italian family that used to say mean things about the Irish, so I think I have the same racial make-up as Obama. But does racial make-up do anything to make me a better president? Think about this before you get your tighty-whiteys in a pinch.

3. I met a guy this week who asked me if I watched professional wrestling. I said no and asked him why. He said so I would know how good looking his wife is, because she looked like "those wrestling chicks." I'm sorry, I get an entirely different image than the one he intended (I think).

4. I urge John McCain to pick either Bobby Jindall or Mitt Romney for Veep, but he's going to pick that doofus from Pennsylvania. I hope Barama picks Hillary but he's going to pick a sitting governor.

5. John Edwards with a mistress and a love child caught by photographers at the Beverly Hilton? No. You're kidding me! That guy? He didn't seem sleazy at all.

Well that's it kids. For the next seven days, nothing but enthusiasm, positivity and the occasional happiness parade. Get your insulin vials ready. Even though I'm aggravated at like everybody in the entire world, I will perservere through Super Positivity Week & Happiness Parade for you - the people. The real me will be back in a week. I think. Unless this is the real me and I've been confused by exterior forces my whole life. Who the hell knows?

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